What is Wicked Karma?

While I'm slowly slogging through posting my day by day trip report from India a looong time ago, a lot has transpired. My understanding of Hindi, while still terrible, is slowly expanding. My adoption of Indian culture is ever expanding (more on this in the future, but contingent on certain events in my life I will happily elaborate on in the future ) and last year in 2013 my best friend and I formed a company.

DJ RDX and I had previous experience working with a different Bollywood party group, but after being let go when we wanted to contribute our own ideas and work on things other than a club party, it just worked out this way, so we decided to pursue our own interests anyway. We had two really successful cruise parties trying to innovate what entertainment means for desis and non desis alike in Seattle. We also faced a few failures in 2013. We cannot innovate without a crowd attracted to us that trusts us.

We decided on a new approach in 2014 to have a party every month and build that crowd and trust with our customers and make a great experience and then do the innovative stuff. So far we're meeting our goals we set for 2014, which is awesome.

Q&A

How did you discover Bollywood music?
This may have been mentioned elsewhere on the blog but basically through my coworkers when I was consulting at AT&T. It was such a nice team we shared a lot of cultural things together. I think the first video song shared with me was Shiela ki jawani. After that my first Indian movie was Enthiran in Tamil, though it was also released as 'Robot' in Hindi.

As a kid, I would dance to music in my room because no one was watching. When I started hearing this music it made me feel like I could dance like no one was watching. Initially it was difficult for me to find music to listen to because I didn't know what I was searching for. The more songs I heard, the more I knew what to look for, and seeing my friends show me music helped me understand. If you are a fan, its as easy as searching on YouTube for "Bollywood" but its easier to narrow it to Bollywood 2014 or romance songs, or any other search key. I quickly started a long twisting journey through the genres of music Bollywood explores (its a total fusion, there's hip hop, instrumental, pop, electronic, acapella, and so many more). I quickly became addicted to listening to it and it was like a never ending acid trip through the rabbit hole.

Who is your favorite Bollywood actor or actress?
More and more I want to see strong female roles in Bollywood. Because of the cultural climate in India, only now in 2014 are we starting to see actresses (read: Heroines) break the mold of the damsel in distress or oppressed girl who isn't allowed to marry her lover and step into more complex roles like action or independant roles (Please watch Queen starring Kangana Renaut) I digress, if I have to talk about a female its probably Deepika Padukone or Anushka Sharma. The Kareena/Katrina thing I find unimpressive and lacking charm. Your opinion obviously will vary, I'm just stating mine.

Aamir Khan. My favorite hero. I don't know why he decided to do Dhoom 3 (I suspect to expand his role and step out of his typecast persona) but other than that he has made some very impactful movies. He also makes a television show speaking out on difficult/taboo social topics (The Indian Oprah?) called Satyamev Jayate. From Infanticide to rape and other topics people whisper about, he brings it into the public eye. I applaud him for this. I really hope to meet him someday.

How did you connect what became a passion for Indian music to planning events?
I feel everything happened on accident. Or maybe the right word is serendipity. While I was working at AT&T, I started attending club parties. I had never done this in my life, so for an American thats kind of a late blooming thing to do in your late 20s. I somehow met a very charismatic DJ and made a few suggestions, and hung a few posters at my workplace to help promote him. The next thing I knew I was growing a struggling party into a very large affair, doing a news interview, then organizing New Year's Eve parties and just becoming deeply involved with other fans of this.

When I started my own business to do this, I had experimental self taught skill in Photoshop and Lightroom, a self driven interest in SEO, and an intuitive knack of how to market something like this.

So you're saying you do all of the work?
So Wicked Karma is almost completely run by me and DJ RDX. I am completely the marketing and business side of things, and he dedicates a lot of time to hunt for new music and to practice his art of DJ'ing which is harder than it looks if you want to do it well. We have a core group of friends and other DJs who work with us that it simply would not be possible to produce 300+ person events without help. From door staff, to a photographer (and even handling technical difficulties) to rotating DJs and scoping out venues, a lot of hard work and dedication go into Wicked Karma from a lot of friends who are close like family. It really is a labor of love.

Does it make a lot of money?
I think people who attend parties don't understand how venues and entertainment groups work together and they probably perceive that everyone makes more money than they actually do. I think the more you invest, the more you get out of it. A startup company, with nearly nothing to invest, will not earn a lot, especially while trying to attract fans (both casual and core). If our day jobs were very glorious and high paying, I'm sure we could emulate some of the other groups around the USA who focus on bringing celebrities and throwing big parties. Some of the limitations we face are a limited amount of venues in Seattle, a smaller desi population than say Bay Area, LA, or New York City. Sometimes venues are already totally booked, sometimes there's direct competing events at the same place. A lot of variables go into the bottom line, but the bottom line for a brand new company isn't much. I have hopes to continue to grow and be able to offer more enticing options in regards to venue, special guests, and perks, however I know it will take time.

What about other Indian music?
I am constantly discovering new amazing music. If you're reading this and you're Indian, imagine discovering Rock and Roll or American Pop or hip hop music for the first time (or whatever you're a fan of) and that incredible feeling of 'OMG this is amazing.' I have delved into bhangra, hindi rock, Tamil (huge AR Rahman fan), starting to get exposure and learn about Telugu, Mallu, classical, different eras different styles. I love discovering new things and finding out what I like and what I don't. I love fusions of music too- Red Baraat and Delhi 2 Dublin are some favorites as well.

The problem is, only some of this music is suitable for the club. Of the music that is, there will be many Indians from different states that appreciate music in different languages, and there's no way to many any one party happy. We differentiate ourselves from competing parties as being strictly Bollywood (with the exception of a theme that might focus on another form). There has been a huge influence of Bhangra in Seattle (one of my favorite dance forms) but because of the behavior of others, we're hesitant to play too much of it outside of the realm of what songs show up in Bollywood films. A party group that no longer exists had trouble with violence in the club, and even recently this year a person was thrown through the glass at a different party's night. Its a difficult topic because its not the music's fault, but a few people spoil it for the rest of the crowd. We also look at Bollywood only from a branding perspective.

People are absolutely allowed to like more than one DJ at a time, but I think oftentimes DJs don't think that way. There's already a good representation of Bollywood/Bhangra/Top 40 in Seattle and we want to be branded as the Bollywood only group and see how our crowd develops. I'm sure there will be overlap in fans but so far, based on parties I've attended versus the ones I've thrown, we have attracted a totally different crowd and that makes me happy. I feel like people are getting to know us based on Bollywood reputation.

Do your Djs also produce music?
Yes! DJ RDX and our associated DJs love to invent new music as well. Unfortunately not everyone understands that DJs and producers are two very different things. Not all of our DJs produce. DJs are there in the crowd mixing live, and any wrong button pressed will completely influence the energy of the party. Producers have to understand music from a more mathematical point of view and use totally different tools. To them songs are broken into not only beats, but by different insutrments, sounds, voices. They combine old sounds to make new sounds, or use tools to even invent brand new sounds.

What's the most interesting thing that has happened in one of your parties?
There have been some interesting events that I've been a part of personally and some that I have heard about. I think just being different and doing the first cruise parties in Seattle was a landmark event. I often get asked in a party "Do you like Bollywood music?" by an attendee who probably doesn't realize I'm the host. That never gets old. I also have met someone very special in my life because of these events that I don't think I would have met otherwise. I think its the same for other people, a lot of friendships and bonding are forged. People make new friends, have new experiences, and get inspired to be more social and to break out of their shells and dance more. It was memorable when people got seasick/too drunk on the first cruise too. I opted to not post the photos of the leaning over the garbage can. The whole thing is such an organic process that we learn something new every party about how to plan our next and how to make it bigger and better.

If you could give one piece of advice to your fans what would it be?
I think I would recommend that people step out of their comfort zone. If its hearing a new form of music, or trying a dance step you see someone else doing on the dance floor, talking to someone you normally wouldn't have interacted with, take a little bit of courage and do it. It will enrich your life and broaden your horizon, even if just a little bit. If you've always wanted to do something - why are you waiting? Go try it!

Day 7- The Wedding Day & Valentine's Day

Unfortunately blogging always has a challenge of being appealing only when in the mood to write. Sometimes I'm busy doing other things, sometimes I'm not. I'm so glad I recorded my thoughts when I was in India to be able to continue to share them, even if at a snail's pace.

The day started with getting picked up by a van full of friends, some I've met in the US and some I've made here. We six went to the home of a mutual friend who was unable to make the trip back to India to attend the wedding. Her parents had set out this amazing spread of food and sweets and biscuits and had a really beautiful home. We sat down to lunch and they setup a webcam to talk their daughter who was in Seattle. It was nice to have everyone together and see how jovial and lighthearted they are. I rarely get moments like these because I don't usually get to go do things with a large group of friends. Usually it's small 3 maybe 4 people dinners but a trip to India and meeting people I know and hanging out was just way cool.

We ate as much as we could for lunch and drank just as much paani (water) as the filter here was really good and the water tasted great. Some of the guys even took a few bottles to go. We also got to talk to the daughter after eating and she shared the laptop around on video chat to show her friends and roommates who were also there and knew some of us. I didn't really know them but they gave an introduction. It was nice.

It was a beautiful warm sunny day out so after coming back to the grooms house with more sangeet happening we left for some last minute shopping. We found a tailor to do a very fast alteration on my suit. the top needed to be let out and he agreed to do it for rs 20. that's leas than 50 cents in USD!! incredible! We headed to Bhootnath market where some needed nagra type shoes (the tip is curled) and I wanted some bangles to wear with my Salwar. One of the ladies we were with jumped into a jewelry store guarded by a man with a large automatic weapon and I saw some anklets that were beautiful and I'm told this kind you'll only get in Lucknow. They are silver and sold by weight. I picked up a pair similar to my friends for rs 1700. Not bad for a type of jewelry you'll not find anywhere in the US. Speaking of things famous in Lucknow, it's known for tandoori chicken kabob and also Chikan fabrics. Chikan suits are hand made embroidered suits you can pick out and then have stitched accordingly to your size. I would love to get something like this for my mom but I'm not sure she would like the style. I think I'll have to look for some kind of kurta every day wear type thing.

I tried some street snack that was like a mixture of rice crispy cereal and salsa and it was actually pretty good (in hindsight this is bhel puri and some of my favorite chaat). In this market I saw so many pretty dresses for sale, lots of stalls selling knick knacks and some hawking religious things as well. There's sweets for sale and even fireworks. There was a flower stall as well that one of the girls picked to bring for the wedding and while we were waiting for the arrangement to be done there were street urchins begging us. We kept telling them no and finally someone bought them some fruit. I saw them picking through the bags but not eating. When I glanced again they were gone. I suspect these two commonly work at this market for some boss. If I was starving and begging for food and someone gave it I would be eating it then and there not running off.

From our group one of the girls picked a sari to wear with one of the guys getting his shoes. In the meantime a stall made a set of bangles for me that are beautiful red and green with white stones as well. They will match a few things I have to wear and they looked amazing with the mehendi on my arm. With a little trouble getting my American plastic to work in ATMs in India we haggled and begged. "Uncleji please let us have for this lower price, please." I really was always getting charged high prices just based on the color of my skin and hair.

We ran a little short on time so we had to go back and get ready for our friends big day! We picked up my altered suit which fit perfect and I grabbed a Thums Up on the way out, I love it's taste and we reached back and started to freshen up.

Right before all of the ceremonies were about to begin, someone brought a small brown bag to the groom's house. A few of us secretly stepped outside the Brahmin home to eat the most amazing Indian KFC chicken. I dream of how it tastes. I felt like a shady criminal, doing something untoward in an alley outside the home. In reality I was simply eating meat outside of the home to show respect to the family and it's beliefs who live there.

When we came back inside after eating and found the groom to have some thatched palm tied to his head, being walked down and a candle lit in the streets. I'm not sure what the word is for this but it had to be some form of pooja to help him on his journey to a blessed married life. We also watched as he was then dressed in a wedding form of dhoti and two men tightly wrapped a turban around his head.

We again came downstairs to see a beautiful horse. The groom would then mount the horse as we became the baraat, dancing our way between him atop the horse and a bus with a DJ playing bollywood and bhangra songs. We danced in the street, cordoned off by men carrying large pillars on their heads with rope lights keeping us safe from the traffic in the road we were sharing.

Street urchins dashed in and out hoping to pick up some spare coin from the elder folks swirling rs 100 notes (And more) above the dancers heads to bless them for a very good dance performance. They eventually disturbed us they got yelled at and kicked out of the baraat by my friend's uncle. It was sad and funny at the same time.

We eventually arrived at small hall where there was some small food, I think another ceremony was performced, then we danced again to the main wedding hall. This was as large as a football field, almost. As we came in we were greeted by all of the people from the bride's side of the family and inside there was a stage area, another area nearby with a fire burning, vendors lining the entire place with wedding food (pav bhaji, paani puri, hakka noodles, vegetarian, ice cream, sweets, you name it) mocktails, and even a paan & hookah stall.

We came in, roamed around, took photos, ate. I was approached by some brave desis who had some grasp on English and were eager to talk to me. I felt under the impression that an American coming so far for a wedding in Lucknow was not only memorable but I seemed like a celebrity. I also felt the stares from the thousand or so pair of eyes on me.

When the bride and groom were ready they walked out onto this small raised stage, holding large garlands (traditionally made from flowers which a game is played to 'catch' the other person) and everyone went wild as they placed the garlands on each other. A staple of nearly any Indian marriage (smaller customs vary not just on state but regionally, India is host to hundreds of cultures) This is one part of the ceremony done.

The bride and groom then sat and we joined them for dinner and drinks and guests came and gave their congrats. After a time, the people who came just for the food filtered out and we approached the mandap by the stage. As guests came in, we removed our shoes to sit near the bridge and groom for the coming rituals (Again a temple like respect is given so removing shoes is important) and a game of hiding the grooms shoe's began as the friends and family delighted in this childish game. Even to some of the Indians, the pandit who was beginning some chanting couldn't understand what he said, but its a very lengthy ritual. Sometimes the women were singing or drumming on a dholki, even I tried my hand at it and got some impressed looks as I tapped out what I thought was a bhangra beat.

We sat patiently, even spying an uncle who fell asleep during the long ceremonies, eventually getting some marigold petals ready to throw as the bride and groom made their traditional 7 rounds around the sacred fire. This is there in almost all Indian weddings as well, and we watched the tieing of the manglasutra, and the donning of kumkum in bright crimson red on the bride's forehead. A true sign of a married woman. My heart was swelled with happy emotions, elating in the revelry, traditions much older than my own country, and a sense of pride in myself for having made the journey to witness something so sacred.

The work wasn't all over for the bride and groom, however, they had more rituals to finish but the remaining friends and family returned home. I noted that it was about 5am. Definitely time to rest up.

How to order the American Coffee: Wilbur in Seattle

Day 6 (the day before the wedding!)

Getting back on track to telling my previous trip to India..


The day before the wedding


I got ready in the morning and came over to the grooms house not knowing what to expect. There's a ceremony called haldi rasam where turmeric is applied all over the groom and the families faces. The moment I stepped onto the top terrace aunties were more than happy to apply on me and give to me to apply. Afterwards I Was told that whoever puts the haldi on is said to be married next. I wonder if its true? It's amusing also that there's an equivalent of catching the brides bouquet and that this is it.


Afterward there was more sangeet with blessings and gifting of new clothes. Also mehendi (aka henna) was being done this day. Some common friends had landed this day in time for the wedding as well so we were participating in mehendi. I had traditional Indian designs completely on my forearm and hands. The artist who did it had almost permanently stained thumb and forefinger from working with the henna paste and he was very swift and steady and above all patient. He worked on the ladies and kids in the day and later came back in the night to do the grooms design. Here he did a very nice one and kept the bride and grooms name in the design.


The sangeet continued where more singing was done and the groom was anointed with tikka and some other traditions. I couldn't quite understand the meaning of everything but there was a coconut and marigolds and some holy water type of things. Eventually we threw some flower petals at some point. Prayed at some point. Put our hands on the grooms head at some point and photos were taken. I'm trying to recall this two days later and it's difficult because of so many intricacies in the tradition. There's also a part where blessings are given by waving rupees over the head and rupees collected in a thali plate along with some of the flowers. Ill have to research a little more to completely understand the purpose of it all.


Later that evening the aunties left and it was time for some kana and Bollywood music. After we had eaten there was dancing and of course any desi tends to be a little surprised and happy to see me dance. I only wish I could become really good at it like the bride's sisters. It was as if watching them as heroines in an actual movie dancing!


The boys came and joined and the ladies left actually to go for a ride to see where the parents of a girl who couldn't make it are living. They showed us Gomti Nagar area and took us for sweets. There were sweets I'd never seen before but I saw gulab jamon (deemed "syrup-y donut holes" by my AT&T gora colleagues) I had to have the real deal. It was soft warm squishy and so sweet with its rosewater syrup that I was in heaven! The rest of the group got kulfi which is Indian ice cream kind of but I of course am avoiding dairy thanks to my lactarded state. It's been hard when chais all have milk :(


One thing I didn't like was when we were done with the sweets there's no actual garbage system here. Instead of finding a can and throwing it people just throw everything on the street. I mentioned it was hard for me to do as in the US it's just what were taught and it comes natural to think garbage is what you put in the can.


After the sweets we went to a vendor making fresh paan on the street. This is basically a bettle leaf with some seeds and sometimes tobacco and maybe a molasses kind of syrup which all gets wrapped in the leaf and you eat it after food to help digestion. A stray thought occurred that thank god I'm not sick like I was in El Salvador. I wouldn't be able to do or see much! Mostly bottled or filtered water and having food in home or at reputable places seems to have made it alright.


We returned back after accepting an invitation for breakfast the morning of the wedding with the missing friends family. When we reached there was great music playing up on the terrace and we were rushed upstairs to join the festivities. While us ladies were out the boys boozed a little, maybe even a lot. At first it was hard to tell because everyone was so happy, but one of the uncles definitely had a bit too much to drink and it sort of let everyone end the night on a happy note.. and drunk one if you were one of the boys!

Happy Ganesh Charturthi

In India Ganesh's birthday was celebrated yesterday but now that the sun is shining in the west (Or, hiding behind the clouds in Seattle) today is the day to celebrate Ganesh Chaturthi.

It is an auspicious time as it is the birthday of Lord Ganesha. If you click these links to view the wiki page you'll understand why this is important. If you're an outsider to the Hindu religion I also recommend checking out the Hindu pantheon to understand some of the history, structure, and background of the deities. Even I have just scratched the surface of this.

I had a few thoughts on this recently due to some exciting events in my personal life. Let me digress a little and talk about my thoughts on religion growing up.

My mom was raised catholic and my dad was raised episcopalian. I was raised without any formal religious teachings about God. Basically I grew up without going to church, but mom kind of taught me that there is a God, this is how you pray, etc. We never said grace at dinner or anything like that, but if you really want to talk to God you can do it in your heart. I don't remember dad ever saying much on the subject. I remember visiting Grandma's place and she would sometimes have a priest at her house and she would take communion.

Sometime when I was about 5 or 6 years old I distinctly remember a time while riding in the car with my mom.
Me: Mommy, Santa Claus isn't real is he? You guys just put the presents.
My Mom: Sweetie, I don't want to get into a wreck. I was hoping it would take longer for you to figure out but that's right. He's a really cool guy who brings you presents and we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.
Me: Okay, so its still cool to celebrate the Holiday, but will you keep bringing me presents?
My Mom: Of course, and your birthday is very close so we'll celebrate the whole time
Me: Yay! Hey, does that mean God is fake too?

At this point my mom didn't crash the car but I can imagine after being indoctrinated with Catholic beliefs and guilt I really have to give her credit for being so level. She knew they were raising me to allow me to have my choice of what to believe, which is very wise, but I'm sure this is a difficult topic from the eyes of the parent.

So my mom's parents who were staunch Catholics felt I was praying and believing in God and all these things. After I asked this question to my mom I remember her asking me not to let my Grandma know that I didn't believe in God. In retrospect I find it kind of messed up yet harmless at the same time.

I went through a period where I was a complete atheist. Science and Logic were my friends, especially when it came to explaining things that went BUMP! in the night. For a while as a kid I was scared of the dark and that aliens would come beam me up and probe me. Also, possibly ghosts.

In time these feelings wore off and I went back and forth between atheist and agnostic. I felt a little redeemed that atheism is on the rise which means Americans are being less suppressed and can truly express their religious freedom - or freedom to lack of religion.

While all of this was going on, and only now at age 30 can I see it, I learned fantastic things about the universe. And Physics! and what a truly remarkable place we live in, that our tiny brains simply cannot comprehend. I would fall asleep at night when I wasn't able to sleep by trying to understand how vast the universe is, and what else could exist out there. My favorite thoughts were what the shape of the universe was like and what its edges are made out of - or if it doesn't have edges, how does that work?

I started to understand that faith doesn't need God - you can check what Secular humanism and maybe in a way it best describes me. I'm not sure, that keeps changing even now. I also began to realize that the Universe contains such wonderful seemingly magical mysteries- that I believe if we evolve enough we would somehow come to understand- but in my lifetime and next few generations it wont happen, that that child-like wonder towards the universe and its contents and my inability to fathom all it contains is kind of what God is to me. When people assume God has a toga and a beard and sports everlasting flipflops, it kind of makes me laugh. Why should I presume this shape and sense and things in the Bible which were man made things?

Throughout my life maybe I believe in God but just in a very different fantastic, typical Christie way.

And recently I had a revelation. In order to understand Hinduism and its various deities, maybe it has a place in my understanding of God. Deities would be conduits to connect my thoughts to the universe.

Praying, to me, has been willing the universe to do something in my favor, for which my willpower alone has accomplished many things for me. I never understood how it worked. Maybe I just asked nicely, or was in the right place at the right time, fate or kismet, something always worked out. In order to understand how Indians do poojas (a Hindu prayer) this is how I have begun to understand Hinduism.

Again, I'll never actually be a Hindu, I was not born to it - in the eyes of Indian people, but there is nothing stopping me, or anyone else who believes in the concept of God in any way, to think of the universe like this.

And at this auspicious time, I've found a friend in Ganesha.

Day 4 - Headed to Lucknow!

The morning of day 4 was a little hectic as I had to pack and meet my friend for breakfast, rush up to the metro line that goes to the airport, and then to fly to Lucknow. It's not easy getting two people 1 suitcase and 2 bags into an auto rickshaw!




Breakfast consisted of what I would describe as masala French toast (I think I would try making this at home) and some sweet stuff like oatmeal but more mashed up. I liked it a lot but I'm not sure if I ate it everyday if it would become boon or bane to my waistline.




The whole time I have been in India so far people stare at me since I am a foreigner and my skin and hair are fair. I know I stand out. I just try to act normal and it's easier to do at an airport where people are used to foriegners. Upon reaching Indira Ghandi International I saw the whole airport in the daytime clearly, not in a jet lagged sleep deprived daze. The sun was shining and the dust that covers this region blanketed everything and created an ever looming haze outside. I think this is a mixture of dust that comes from the region and leftover smog. The city has changed it's public transportation away from oil products so air quality has improved somewhat from a few years ago from what I'm told.




I walked around the terminal and it's shops for time pass (how you pass time when bored) and saw some masala dosa place and some Mughlai cuisine as well. I avoided them as my flight was only an hour and I didn't want to spend on food when I just had breakfast. The smell of the non veg on the grill was tempting though.




I wandered into a magazine shop that had some books and DVDs as well. It was a little odd because right next to the cool Bollywood stuff was a section containing Playboy and other, erm, adult themed items.

I picked up Forbes magazine with a shiny silver cover featuring Shah Rukh Khan. This edition is talking about how Indian celebrities have made and sustained their fortunes. I also grabbed Filmfare so I could jam my brain with useless Bollywood gossip and look at photos of the likes of John Abraham and Saif Ali Khan while I waited for my flight.




While sitting in the terminal none other but a very likely American and most definitely a nerd walked by with thick glasses curly hair and a very fat travel book that simply said "India." I felt bad that he was likely being overcharged on everything! I really felt even just being here with a friend is by far a better experience than being a complete foriegner and not having a more personal connection with the place of visit.




Finally I boarded my flight, still a little frustrated I had to pay for some baggage overage, but took my front row window seat and settled in to watch the land roll by for the next hour. I really enjoyed seeing temples and other tall buildings that rose from the land and want to spend time with Google earth later on when I'm back in the USA to learn what I saw.




Finally I touched down, got my luggage and saw another friend waiting to greet me at the gate. I haven't smiled so big in a while!! This friend is about to get married in a few days and it will be in a most grand style. He has a driver who works for his family who took us from the airport to where his dad works at a botanical research guest house. It was roughly and hour ride and I noticed Lucknow is much less densely crowded than Delhi and seems more affluent as well. While still crowded and chaotic it was only half that of Delhi! My friend told me this is mostly due to this having always been a place where kings and queens and royalty would visit from the British.




I greeted my friend's father and while he speaks English I think he is a quiet person normally and more so being shy not knowing what to do or say to this gori. He was so incredibly kind, however. He let me stay in his guest house for an evening while there is a whole crew at his house preparing renovations and work for the wedding. I freshened up and put on a Salwar kameez (kind of an indian ladies suit) to properly meet my friends family. I wanted to make them feel comfortable as much as possible especially since my friend's mom doesn't speak English.




Before visiting his house and family we ran some errands. I got to see inside of a very large bank, and while it was a little boring waiting on all the finances for the wedding to be done, it was a very curious experience seeing and listening to how a bank here is compared to one from the West. Afterward I got to see the area and house my friend has grown up in. He was pointing out where he and his friends would meet to just chit chat and enjoy some food for a short while and also where he went to school. If I had spent roughly 20-25 years in this area I think I would feel happy and fond to be home. I am looking forward to meeting his fiancée, I think she'll be perfect for him. They have known each other for sometime and he works in the tech industry and dresses very well, while she is a fashion designer. Hoho, truly a match made in heaven and they even look like they belong together!




I felt shy reaching his house. It is a tall 3 story one that's white with orange accents. He introduced me to his mom and I bowed and put my hands together and said, "Namaste." She gave her blessing to me putting a red substance called tikka on my forehead and some rice. Ill have to ask more of the meaning behind this tradition. Then she fed me a sweet and invited me in. I met many aunts uncles and cousins and a maid. We talked for some time as some of the elders were asking questions and my friend patiently translated. The whole time we were treated to tea and snacks and then a dinner of paranthas and sabji with some veg curry. It was delicious! I was impressed by the hospitality and had no idea how much I was about to bond with this family. They were a little impressed I could speak a little bit of Hindi- and over the next several days my skill would increase a little also!




We then left and went for some shopping so I would have something to wear for the wedding. We went to this shop that had the most amazing clothes- I wanted to buy so many things but still haven't fixed my situation with money yet. Still working on that! I later found out that this shop was in a place called Bootnath Market. I could definitely go for shopping here on the weekends if I lived nearby!




I picked out a red one that is a little tight they will need to alter it, I suspect it's not too much trouble. At least it shouldn't be expensive even if the dress was a little bit.




Afterwards we returned back to the guesthouse where I stayed the night. There I met Piyush's uncle and he was very friendly. Curious and bold about this gori. He seemed like an uncle from a college like a professor type. I recognized the longtime Lucknow accent when he spoke as it reminded me of some coworkers from AT&T.




The hospitality is too generous and a little suffocating. I've ended up with a room full of snacks sweets fruits and an unfortunate bottle of expired orange juice. I'd really enjoy an orange juice right now. I didn't mind though, I had a place where I could sleep peacefully- and also watch Bollywood songs on UTVStars channel on the TV. I also, thank the heavens, had hot water and a western toilet!

Photos from India!

Here's a nice little slideshow of my travels in India. This set does not include the wedding photos. I'll have a separate post for them.